Inuyasha and the Seven.. Youkais
by Accessa
Summary: This is just the IY cast in the storyline of Snow White and The Seven dwarves. It's rated for Sesshie chan's and Inu chan's foul mouths. Oneshot Please Review so I know whether iu should continue writing ficcies or not! Onegaishimas!


Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha or the other characters. They belong to Rumiko Takahashi-sensei. In blue are my comments. Green's for the characters. But I dont know if they will come out on the webpages. The story line isn't mine either. And I warn all of you the characters are pretty out of character. -_-; And this is my first fanfic so please bear with me.  
  
Inuyasha: "Hey! How come I got the part of snow white?"   
Sesshoumaru: "Shut up you stupid hanyou! At least you got a big part. Kono Sesshoumaru!!! got a MINOR part as one of the stupid, ugly, dwfffffffffff.....!?"*had his mouth covered*  
Accessa: "Now, now Sess-chan you don't want to spoil it for every body, do you?" *grins evilly*   
Sesshoumaru:*shakes his head violently*  
Accessa: *turns to Inuyasha* "Anymore comments?"  
Inuyasha: "um...........like he said.........Snow White's not so bad. Eh..........heh.........heh"   
Accessa: "Good. Then let's get started. Iku zo!"  
  
Inuyasha and the Seven ......Youkais?   
By: Accessa   
Once upon a time, in the Warring States, there was a fair ningen queen and her husband, the Great Lord of the Western Land, a white inu youkai, the king, had a BEAUTIFUL (glares from Inuyasha) son named Inuyasha. His skin and hair was as white as snow, his eyes as gold as the sun, and err.........I guess that's it?(gomen ne!! I really didn't know what else to write -_-;). Inuyasha was a good little boy most of the time, though he does get mischievous sometimes. One day, when Inuyasha was 7, Inuyasha's mother died and the king married another woman Yura. Yura had a magic mirror on her plate that would respond truthfully to her questions. Everyday she would chant:  
" Mirror, mirror on my plate, who has the fairest hair of all Warring States?", and her mirror would always respond. " There is none other that has hair fairer than you my queen."   
But, Yura couldn't stand Inuyasha's beautiful white hair anyway, and the attention that he was receiving from the king. So, when Inuyasha was about 13, she accused Inuyasha, of terrible deeds that he didn't even do, to the king. The king, who didn't want to upset his wife, made Inuyasha the same level as their high classed servants, dressed him in less luxurious clothes, made him do chores, and lose his place as the heir of the throne. Inuyasha, being a naturally good kid did as he was told and never did he violate any of the rules. When Inuyasha was 15, the king died and Yura was treating Inuyasha even worse than before. She made him the lowest class of the servants. She dressed him in rags and made him do chores that even the servants didn't have to do. But he didn't complain once. Inuyasha was friendly and good-natured, but none of the servants dared befriend him for they were afraid of the wrath of Yura.   
One day, Yura chanted to her mirror:  
"Mirror, mirror on my plate, who has the fairest hair of all Warring States?". She was expecting the same answer as she always did but the mirror responded:  
"Though you do have fair hair my queen, but Inuyasha has hair fairer has than you." Yura was enraged with the mirror's response wanted to break the mirror. But she knew that the mirror was only speaking the truth and decided that she needed a plan to get rid of Inuyasha. So, the next day, Yura ordered that Inuyasha go buy her some hair gel and rose scented hair spray for her in a neighboring town that was famous for their hair products. After Inuyasha left, Yura hired the assassin Jakotsu (who was madly in love with Inuyasha, read chapter 236 and 237 of the manga) to kill Inuyasha and cut his hair and bring it back to her as proof. When Inuyasha was returning to the castle through the forest, Jakotsu couldn't kill the one he loved and told Inuyasha to leave and never to return to the castle again. Inuyasha just kept running in the woods blindly until he couldn't anymore and collapsed in the woods. While Inuyasha was running away, Jakotsu bought a wig of white hair and chopped off a large quantity of the hair and returned to the castle and gave the hair to the Yura.   
When Inuyasha awoke, he was lost and doesn't know where to go so he just heads straight. When he reached the end of the woods, he spotted a little cottage and knocked. But there was nobody home and the door wasn't locked, so he went in. There he found 7 beds and the dirtiest and dustiest room he ever saw. So, as a habit he stared tidying it up, sweeping and washing the entire room. When Inuyasha was done it was so clean that not a dusty thing was in sight. After tidying up the room, he made supper for eight, including himself. He waited a couple hours before eating, but nobody came home so he ate first. When he was finished he was so tired and picked the bed with a sword that looks suspiciously like the Tenseiga and slept.   
Later around midnight, seven MINOR figures(glares from Sesshoumaru and the OTHER six figures) went into the cottage. They were shocked to see how clean the house was and a figure sleeping in one of the beds. They quickly surrounded the bed and saw a BEAUTIFUL(daggers from Inuyasha).   
"GODDAMMIT YOU STUPID HANYOU!!!!!! GET THE HELL OFF KONO SESSHOUMARU'S BED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"*Sesshoumaru shoves Inuyasha off the bed.*  
"ITAIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!! What the HELL are you doing SESSCHAN!!!!!!!" Inuyasha yelled. "You're not following the stupid script!!!!!!!!"  
"How dare you call me, kono watashi, SESS CHAN?!?!?! And what do I care about the stupid script?!?!" Sesshoumaru shot back.   
*POW*!!!!!!!!!! Both Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha are sporting lumps on their heads. "I DO!!! Sess-chan, Inuyasha! TEME YO!! What are you guys arguing about THIS TIME?!?! Just do what the script says!!!!!" Accessa fumes.  
"It's all INUYASHA'S fault!!!!!!!!!!! Of all the beds there, he picks MY, KONO SESSHOUMARU'S BED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"*Sesshoumaru crosses his arms*  
"It's not my fault!!!!!!!! I did as the script said and chose ANY bed!!!!!!!" Inuyasha shot back.  
"NANI~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This stupid argument was over the BEDS?!?!?!?!? Whatever, I don't cares whose fault it was JUST GET WITH THE GODDAMNED SCRIPT!!!!!!!"  
Inuyasha gets back on SESSHOUMARU's bed and Sesshoumaru stomps back to his spot.  
Ok, as I was saying, the 7 figures surrounded Inuyasha. Inuyasha, feeling uncomfortable all of a sudden, woke up to see the UGLIEST midget (glares from that figure) he ever seen.   
"GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Inuyasha.  
"Hey! Watch what you're screaming at!" Jaken shouted.  
"YEAH! I'm watching!!!!!!!! YOU!!!"( Inuyasha: "What's the meaning of having me see JAKEN of all the people?!?!?!" Accessa: "I see that you don't understand the rules around here. I'm the fanfic writer around here, so what I write GOES!!")   
And so, Inuyasha meets the 7 owners of the house which were Sesshoumaru, Jaken, Kikyou (yeah I know I wrote youkai but I don't got anyone else to include-_-;), Naraku, Kagura, Hiten, and Manten. The seven youkais decided that Inuyasha can stay as long as he cooks for them, do the chores, and watches the house, which Inuyasha agrees. ( much to all the youkais dismay except for Kikyou who was delighted) They question him about like why he was there and who was he. So, Inuyasha explained what happened to him and his relationship to Queen Yura. As they leave to work every day, they warned Inuyasha of his evil stepmother and not to let anybody in the house. (Sesshoumaru, Naraku, Jaken, Hiten, Manten, Kagura: "Like we care if he dies!!!!!" Kikyou: "I CARE!!!!!!!!!!!!" * the other youkais glare at her* "Traitor!!!!!!!!!!!!!")  
Back at the castle, Yura was happy to see the beautiful hair of what she thinks is Inuyasha (Yura: Hey! I AM a hair youkai!!!!!!! I should be able to tell the difference between hair from a wig and real hair!!!!! Accessa: like I said what I say GOES!) so, she immediately goes to her mirror and chants:  
"Mirror, mirror on my plate, who has the fairest hair of all Warring States?", expecting that it would be her she was fixing her hair in front of the magical mirror. But the mirror responded:  
"Though you do have fair hair my queen, but Inuyasha still has hair fairer has than you.". This response shocked Yura for she thought that Inuyasha was dead. Then, she realized that the hair that Jakotsu brought back was fake and decided that she'd solve the problem herself. So, she asked the mirror:  
"Where is Inuyasha now?!?" and the mirror responded: "Inuyasha is living with seven youkais in the woods."  
With that she went around the whole Warring States and collected information of the Shikon no Tama and made a fake copy just like it. Disguised as a old peddler woman, Yura went to the home of the seven youkais.   
She knocked on the door and cried, "Magical stone, Magical stone, Wishing stone!!!!!! Guaranteed to work!!!"  
Inuyasha looked out of the window and recognized the Shikon no Tama, which he thought was lost in all the Warring States.   
"Yo! Baa baa!!! Gimme that Jewel!" Inuyasha responded to Yura.  
Baa baa?!?! How dare he call me that!!! Yura wanted to say but said instead, "You got good taste young man! This is the legendary Shikon no Tama! I'll sell it to you for 700 yen! It's a real deal!". And Inuyasha let Yura in, thinking that she is no harm to him.  
"Let me put it around your neck." Yura offered and Inuyasha agreed. Yura took this chance to choke it around his neck. She did it so quickly that Inuyasha had no chance to respond and fell to the floor. She ran away laughing, "Now I have the fairest hair in all the Warring States!!!! Hahahaha!!" all the way back to her castle.   
The seven youkai came back to see Inuyasha on the floor with the fake Shikon no Tama around his neck. Kagura was about to take it off of him since that was her part but was pulled back by 5 of her other members.  
"Yo! Let the stupid hanyou die. Gives us a better life!" said Naraku. Kikyou: Who are you to be calling MY Inuyasha a HANYOU?!?! You're a HANYOU YOURSELF!!!!" All the youkais except Kikyou: "Whose side are you on?!?!?! You're supposed to be on OUR side!!!!!! NOT HIS!!!". "Ahem!!!!!!!!!!!! You're supposed SAVE him before he chokes!!!!!!!!!"* looks at Inuyasha* "Eto.... I thinks he's dead." * looks at the youkais* "Well, go save HIM!!!!!!!!"  
So, Kikyou rushes over to her love and frees him of the necklace. (*got glares from all the other youkais* Accessa: "Ok Kikyou. I now give you the official job of saving Inuyasha next time")   
* cough* *wheeze* *cough * Inuyasha glares at the youkais. "GODDAMMIT!!!!! I ALMOST DIED!!!!!" All the youkais look bored. Naraku: "Yeah it was such a shame that you didn't. Would've made the lives easier for all of us." *gets a glare from Kikyou * "ok, ok, for most of us." * looks around for any opinions about that*. "And you deserve it because of your stupidity. Don't you remember that your woman shattered it AND KONO NARAKU HAVE MOST OF THE SHIKON SHARDS?"  
"Kisama......"Inuyasha starts. "OK, OK BACK TO THE STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
So, Kikyou saves Inuyasha from the fake Shikon no Tama, and gets the story from him. She then warns him not to open the door for that old peddler woman must be his stepmother in disguise.  
When Yura returns home, she went to her plate and chanted: "Mirror, mirror on my plate who has the fairest hair of all Warring States?" and the plate replies: "You stupid dim-wit!!!!! Look closer I'm your dinner plate not you mirror plate!!!". Then the queen dropped the plate on the floor and went to the magical one. "Mirror, mirror on my plate, who has the fairest hair of all Warring States?" And the mirror replied, "Though you do have the second fairest hair in the Warring States, Inuyasha still has the fairest hair of all." The queen was so shocked to hear that Inuyasha was still alive and decided to come up with another scheme to kill Inuyasha. She made a large, baggy, blood red yukata and placed a spell on it that kill the body slowly so that he could feel the pain. She dressed as another old peddler woman and traveled to the seven youkais' home. Again she found Inuyasha alone. She knocked on the door and cried, "Hand made yukata! In style now!"   
But Inuyasha replied, "Go away baa baa I ain't supposed to let anyone in this cheap house." But Yura said, "But you are not forbidden to look! C'mon take a look! In style for young men now!" Inuyasha saw the yukata and decided that he liked it and saw that this was another old woman, he let her in. "See? I knew you were a bright young man!" Chump. Yura thought. He is so dumb! Yura offered to help him the kimono saying that she would make refinements to it if it didn't fit. And Inuyasha, thinking that nothing was wrong with that, accepted her offer. As soon as Inuyasha placed it on, there was like a thousand needles poking in his insides.   
*!!* " Teme.....ba..a baa....." and he passed out. Yura skipped all the way home thinking that now that Inuyasha was dead, she would possess the fairest hair of all Warring States.  
Lucky that it was close to evening, the seven youkais came back. When they stepped into the room, they saw Inuyasha twisting and turning in pain. "No interruptions this time!" Kikyou quickly stripped Inuyasha of the yukata and starts on his loincloth. "Yo! Kikyou! Don't go any further than that!!! LEAVE HIS LOINCLOTH ALONE!!!!!!" Kikyou: "Awwww man! You're such a party pooper ya no?"   
Kikyou saves Inuyasha from the poisonous yukata and Inuyasha wakes up. Kikyou throws he arms around him and scolds him with tears in her eyes. "Inuyasha no baka! I warned you about your evil stepmother already! Why did you open the door?! You scared me sooooo much! Don't do that again koi!" Inuyasha explains that since it was a different woman, he thought that it would be safe.   
"............................................................................................................"   
Sesshoumaru: -_-; "..........................................."  
Jaken: -_-; "......................................"  
Hiten: -_-; "............................................"  
Manten: -_-; ".........................................."  
Naraku: -_-; "..........................................."  
Kagura: -_-; "..............................................................."  
All except Kikyou: "HOW STUPID CAN A PERSON GET?!?!?!"  
  
*********************************  
When Yura got back to the castle, she went straight to he mirror and chanted: "Mirror, mirror on my plate, who has the fairest hair of all Warring States?" And the mirror answered as before: "Though you do have the second fairest hair in the Warring States, Inuyasha still has the fairest hair of all." This enraged the queen so much she decided to get rid of Inuyasha once and for all. She went to a secret laboratory and started to make a bowl of ramen. She poisoned it that only a kiss from a princess could wake him up. She disguised as a young female peddler this time and went to the house of the seven youkais.   
While Inuyasha was washing for the youkais, he suddenly smelt the strong odor of his favorite food.....................ramen!!!!!(read volume 3 when they first meet Shippou, and I'm not sure if it's his favorite but he liked it) He peeked out the window and saw a young woman walking house to house selling ramen. Great. Now my stomach is rumbling for that ramen! Kuso!  
Now with Inuyasha being a delinquent, figured that since last 2 times that Yura had visited him, she was an old lady, then this one couldn't be her for it was a young woman time. "Yo! Onna ga! Gimme a bowl of that wouldja?"   
This is going better than I expected! "Hai!! Chotto matte kudasai!!" Yura hurried to where Inuyasha was. She collected 10 yen for that and watched Inuyasha slurp up the noodles.   
Then Inuyasha suddenly chokes and drops the noodles. "Dammit.......I fell for it.....a....gai....n........." and he passed out. "Oh, hohoho hohoho hoho.......now I possess the fairest hair in the land. Oh, ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho...." Yura put the back of her hand close to her mouth, imitating Naga (from slayers).   
The seven dwar.....err....youkais were just returning home when they all heard the offending laugh. They rush into the house and saw Yura standing over Inuyasha's limp body. "What the Hell happened?!" they all shouted. Kikyou pushes Yura away and rushes to Inuyasha's side. "What have you done to him?!?!?!" Kikyou cried.  
"Oh, all I did was sell him some poisoned ramen that could only be cured if a princess kissed him. Nothing bad. Oh ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ........."Yura replied.  
"ARIGATO GOZAIMASU!!!!! Ya know, we've been trying to get rid of him for the longest time!!!! And you did the job for us!!!!!" all the youkais told her. "Huh? Weren't you guys the ones taking him in?" Yura asked, confused by their behavior. "Nah it was the stupid fanfic writer's fault she made us." Naraku explained. "HEY!! I HEARD THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are so dead Naraku!! I'm gonna get you when this stupid fic is done!!"   
Kikyou: "You're not getting away Yura!! You're going to pay for that!!!" *Kikyou gets up and goes to a chest* "Where the hell are they?!?! Aha!" *turns around with scissors in her hands* "Ack! No! Not those!!!" and the queen runs out of the cottage with Kikyou running after her with the pair of large scissors in her hands.  
*SNIP!!!!!!* *Large portions of Yura's hair fall to the floor* "IYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! My beautiful hair!!!!!! Oh! How....could ..you do this to me?!?" Yura runs away back to the castle, covering her face in shame on the whole way.  
"Inuyasha! Don't worry I'm gonna save you!" She bends down and was about to kiss when she was pulled back by the other youkais. "Hey!! What do you think you're doing?!?" Kikyou yelled at them. "NO! It's what the HELL are YOU doing?!!! Isn't it just better for most of us that he's dead now?! And also you aint no stupid PRINCESS!!! You're a PRIESTESS!!!" Kagura yelled back. Now I don't have to get orders to go kill him!!   
"Oh! That's not a problem. In my eyes, Inuyasha is my prince in shining armor and big chance that in Inuyasha's eyes I'm his princess!" Kikyou replied dreamily. So, Kikyou bent down and kiss Inuyasha on the lips and got up to see his reaction. But Inuyasha remained limp. "Hey! Koi! You're supposed to wake up now!!!" but Inuyasha still didn't have and response. "See? I told you you weren't a princess. Not in his eyes nor anyone else's eyes!", Kagura said smugly. So the seven youkais made a coffin of cheap glass (which they hoped that it could pass for crystal) and err........... "mourned" for him.  
Then, we have a small group walking the woods towards the house of the seven youkais.   
"Hey! Are you sure this is the right way to the to the house?" Kagome asked her bodyguard Sango, while stroking her pet kitsune, Shippou. "Ano....this seems like the right way to it. But I don't see where we are right now hime-sama." Sango replied. They were in the middle of nowhere in the woods. Sango was on her horse looking at the crummy map given to them by the author. "Man, we'll be stuck here forever! I wanna go home and take a hot bath! Being in the Warring States was always tiresome and dirty! Why the hell did the stupid fanfic writer make the house in the middle of nowhere in the woods?!" "AHEM!! That is how it is in the original story!" Kagome: "Well, you changed some of the story anyway!! Why didn't you change the location of the house too?!?!" Accessa: "If I do, then I don't have the chance to tortur............err...I mean that will be changing the too much. Yeah, that's it." Kagome: "Uh-huh. Like I'll believe that." "I always knew you'd be dumb enough to.........."*get glares from Kagome* "I mean........intelligent enough to believe it...Yeah, that's the reason."  
Anyway, so the royal crew were lost in the woods. Suddenly they heard some (a poor excuse for) mourning. So they rode over to sound. There, they saw a zombie priestess(Kikyou, Kikyou: "Hey I resent that!"), doing the dead ritual for a guy with white hair inside a cheap coffin. "Hey! We found them Hime-sama!" Sango reported. "Good. Now we could get this thing over with.". Princess Kagome gets off her white horse and stalks over to Inuyasha's coffin. But Kikyou blocks her path. "Nobody touches MY Inuyasha. Got that?" "Too bad. That's what my script says and plus who says he's yours? In this story he's mine and in the real story he's mine. You are just an imitation body." Kagome replied smugly. Kikyou bursts into tears for losing in an argument and being reminded that she is an imitation body. Then she stepped right passed the priestess and the seven youkais. She was about to kiss him but was stopped by the other youkais. "Hey! What's the big idea? Move!"  
"Uh-uh. You're gonna revive him make life miserable for us. It's better that he's like this." Jaken said. "For once Jaken, kono Sesshoumaru, agree with you." Sesshoumaru replied. "Honto ga? Sesshoumaru sama?" Jaken had tears in his eyes. Sesshoumaru rolls his eyes "Forget that I said that since you are gonna act like an imbecile.". BACK TO THE STORY GUYS.   
"Oh. So that's the problem. I can guarantee that he won't bother you after I revive him." In this fanfic anyway....thinks Kagome. The other 6 youkais consider it since Kikyou is still crying over the insult and losing of the quarrel. Then they turn around and said "DEAL." So, Princess Kagome bent down and kissed Inuyasha's pale lips. Then, she pulled back and waited for the response. But nothing happened.   
"............................................................................................."  
Kagome's patience was wearing thin. She went over to Inuyasha and slapped him hard across the face. "Oi! Anata! Get up!" Kagome screeches. "ITAIIIIIIIIIIII..............." Inuyasha said for both his ears and face. He reaches up and rubs his face. *glares at Kagome* "Teme! You didn't have to hit me. Your part was only to kiss me!" Kagome: "That's EXACTLY why I'm kinda pissed off!!!" Inuyasha: "Huh?" Kagome: "I'll explain later."  
So, Inuyasha wakes from the kiss from the princess tells her his life story. The princess accepts his past and proposes to him. "Will you marry me Inuyasha?" Inuyasha looks at her puzzled. "Err..........aren't the boys supposed to be the ones to propose?" "Yeah but since I got the part of the prince and you got snow white, I propose. Duh............." Kagome rolls her eyes.  
"Oh. Ok. Let me think about it." Inuyasha replied. "Uh-uh you're marrying me no matter what! Cause I lost my first kiss to you so you're going to be my husband and living in my castle and living with me!" Kagome yelled. So she drags him off to her horse and makes him mount the horse. Oh so that's why she was so pissed about having to kiss me......Inuyasha thinks now understanding.   
"Oh yeah, here. My nanny, Kaede, gave me this to give to my future husband." She took out a beaded necklace and placed it around his neck. "Why?" Inuyasha wanted to know.   
"So, I could have some sort of security."  
"How so?"  
"Do you really want to know?"  
"Yeah."  
"OK. Here goes. OSUWARI!"  
Splat! Inuyasha hits the dirt floor. "Ch'...kuso..."  
And they live happily ever after in Kagome's castle and the seven youkais also live in peace........in this fic anyway.  
~~~~~~OWARI~~~~~~  
  
Accessa: "Now Sess chan that wasn't so bad was it?"  
Sesshoumaru: "No, not at all. But I should have gotten the Snow White part with my beauty."  
Accessa: I'll give you a better part next time.  
  
Sorry to those Kikyou fans for making her sound all err......unlike herself but I just have something against her. -_-;  
Got any comments? Flames? I welcome anything! (pathetic right?) mail them to me at   
YoukoAccessa@yyhmail.com 


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